The fear of rejection...

While traveling – and especially when traveling by air – I have found that I always seem to have increased opportunity to share the gospel because I come in contact with so many people. The big question for me always is: will I take advantage of the opportunity?

Fear tends to be the biggest giant I have to face when sharing the gospel: the fear of rejection; the fear that I won’t say the right thing. Both of those fears are based in my pride – and are definitely not based in my reliance on the Lord Jesus Christ. I think I’ve been reflecting on the fear of rejection lately, and that is what I want to focus on today.

The fear of rejection is a very real fear, and since I have experienced rejection a number of times, I know that it is an event that is likely to happen – and so the fear seems even more real.

My prayer is that, if rejection occurs, it would be of the gospel and never of me or my methods. If I am sharing the gospel from a proud, haughty, and hard heart – people will react to me as the messenger. I desire to share with a meek (gentle) spirit:
1 Peter 3:15-16
15 But sanctify the Lord God in your hearts: and be ready always to give an answer to every man that asketh you a reason of the hope that is in you with meekness and fear: 16 Having a good conscience; that, whereas they speak evil of you, as of evildoers, they may be ashamed that falsely accuse your good conversation in Christ.

Lately I had some travel via airplane, and had a lot of opportunities to share. And I had several experiences that relate to rejection.

With one of the flights, I sat next to a gentleman who was friendly, although we didn’t talk a lot since he was busy with his book and I was busy with my laptop. At the end of the flight I gave him a million dollar bill and a tract. He thought it was neat and was thanking me --- until I shared that they were gospel tracts. He then handed them BOTH back and made it clear that he wasn’t interested, and he even seemed offended that I would give them to him in the first place. I experienced a definite dose of rejection.

But, as I think back to that moment – while it was painful - someone politely handing a tract back and saying they aren’t interested really isn’t that bad. He didn’t tear them up into little pieces in front of me and then throw them on the ground. He didn’t spit in my face. He didn’t physically assault me. He didn’t go to the airline and file a complaint that I was harassing him by trying to force my religion on him. He was polite and respectful in doing what I would hope anyone would do that didn’t want the tracts: simply handing them back. And, to be very honest, if someone doesn’t want the tracts I’m offering them, I don’t want to force the tracts on them.

And I think back to Jesus’ words:
John 15:20 Remember the word that I said unto you, The servant is not greater than his lord. If they have persecuted Me, they will also persecute you; if they have kept My saying, they will keep yours also.

I have also thought to myself: if I was to face rejection every time I shared the gospel with someone or tried to give out a tract, would that change the command that the Lord has given me to be busy sharing Him with others? When Jesus gave us the instruction to be busy witnessing, he didn’t include a rejection clause:

Matthew 28:18-20
18 And Jesus came and spake unto them, saying, All power is given unto Me in heaven and in earth. 19 Go ye therefore, and teach all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost: 20 Teaching them to observe all things whatsoever I have commanded you: and, lo, I am with you alway, even unto the end of the world. Amen.

In fact, when Jesus tells me that He’ll be with me, it is an encouragement that, even when I face rejection, He’ll be there. He knows exactly what rejection is like.

And yet I still seem to struggle with the fear. I can think right thoughts in my mind, but I still have to make the conscious choice to overcome the fear – through the strength of Christ – instead of giving in to it.

I believe the key to overcoming the fear of rejection is to do just that: step forward and overcome it. By repeatedly doing so, the fear seems to lessen, even though, for me, it doesn’t ever seem to go away.

Practically speaking, how does overcoming the fear result in encouragement? Because not every one rejects the gospel or tracts...

On these recent flights: I faced one rejection, but had perhaps 10 or so instances of acceptance. Two of those remain in my mind. They seem simple and unimportant, but they encouraged my heart.

If you have flown recently, you’ve noticed that the airlines like to board flights REALLY early. And if you aren’t on the plane twenty minutes prior to scheduled departure, they can actually cancel your ticket. I am usually working on my laptop up until the last minute to board the flight, and a number of times I’ve been the last one on the plane – and then I get to sit with everyone for the next 15-20 minutes while we wait for the flight to depart.

While going to board a flight I was, as usual, one of the last ones to the counter. The fellow at the ticket counter was friendly. After he scanned my ticket and handed back the stub (I forget what we were chatting about), I fished in my laptop bag for a million dollar bill and an “Are You Good Enough to Go To Heaven?” tract. I asked if he had ever been given a million dollar bill before, and he hadn’t – but he was very interested in having one. Even when I told him they were gospel tracts that shared from the Bible about heaven and hell – he was genuinely grateful for them. Not only that, but the lady next to him spoke up and said SHE wanted one. I was experiencing the opposite of rejection: I had someone actually ASKING to be given gospel tracts. And that encouraged my heart!

My final flight was an evening flight that was two and a half hours long. A smaller jet (two seats on each side of the aisle). As usual, the flight was pretty much full. I had an aisle seat (makes the laptop easier to work on), and as I approached my seat I could see that a young “tough” would be next to me: a body-builder, heavily tattooed, with a military-style hair cut.

What a pleasant surprise to find out that he was friendly and outgoing. He was in the military and had a few days before he was being sent to Iraq for a 15-month deployment. He had a wife at home and they had recently found out that she was pregnant. As we talked it became evident that he didn’t want to be away from his family for 15 months, and that he was concerned about his safety. He enjoyed sharing about his tattoos (each one was custom, and some of them had cost $300+) and his military career. We touched briefly on spiritual things, but I didn’t feel led to go through the law with him right then. Once the plane was at altitude I started work on my laptop and he slept the rest of the flight.

When we landed we talked some more, and that is when I gave him several tracts. I shared that I would pray for his safety – and he was incredibly grateful and genuinely moved. He thanked me several times for the tracts and he promised that he would read the tracts. Here was a “tough guy” that had not rejected the gospel (well, at least he hadn’t rejected the initial sharing of the gospel), but had instead been willing to open his heart and share his fears and concerns – while promising to read the gospel tracts.

Lord Jesus, may I always speak truth to myself when I am faced with a fear. And when it is the fear of rejection in sharing the gospel, may I rest in Your promise to be with me, and rejoice in Your goodness to me demonstrated in past acceptances of the gospel.